I have to respond to what Diday said. First, let me just say that most of us men are wired a certain way when it comes to either being Mr. Right, or finding Ms. Right. There is no Mr. or Ms. Right. Not at first anyway. Of course, we all have that hope that the woman we have become infatuated with is Ms. Right. But when we see and feel a woman, she is literally Ms. Right Now. Continue…
Every relationship starts out pretty hopeful. You can’t seem to get enough of each other. Always kissing. Always hugging. Sweet, right? Some women, if not most, always hope that “he might be the one”. This sentiment is not exclusive to women. Men have the same hopes too, believe it or not. But let’s talk about women for now.
How can you tell a Mr. Right from a Mr. Right Now? You can’t. At least not right away. Oh yes, there are lines that men put out there that sound so idiotic. Only a very very slow mind can’t pick up the play. Or worse, an infatuated mind can’t see through the shallowness of the whole act. For some of the Mr. Right Nows, hooking up with women is considered a sport. An insincere courtship that leads to a short and meaningless relationship. By the time the woman wakes up and sees the game for what it is it’s sometimes too late. Continue…
A lot of us sometimes find ourselves stuck in a relationship thats somehow in a serious rut. You want to go right, they want to go left. You say yes, they say no. And for no reason other than just to piss you off. This is a negative relationship. But where do we draw the line? At what point do we know that it’s time to cut the ties that bind in a relationship? There’s often no big event that will let you say ‘that’s it! I’m out!’ Usually, it’s a slow grind, a non-significant significance of daily small events that make you crazy. It’s the negative tone of conversation, or the realization over dinner that makes you say to yourself what the hell was I thinking when I got into this relationship?
Well, enough is enough when you feel you have had enough. Continue…
“Men are afraid of commitment or at least have the reputation of fearing commitment”. It’s equal across the board…women do fear being committed for different reasons. Men’s fear is what they commit to will turn out to be different than what was presented. So many times we hear of women changing after marriage into a someone they weren’t before, and that is frightening to men. Women fear committing to different things. Basically, men fear not having options, women fear having them. Is this the general idea of the fear of being committed? Does that mean that men want the women they’re committed to not to change? We all know that women have the reputation of wanting their men to change when they’re married or committed. Continue…
There are days when you and your partner are not on the same vibe. Somehow this is more apparent when the couple has been together for quite sometime already. New relationships often try to make allowances of each other’s shortcomings. But not for those who had some years between them. No sir! Tensions between couples like these are quite normal. I’ve seen my parents go at each all these years. It’s not surprising anymore. In fact, it always irked me when after their argument I’ll find them in a corner very sweet to each other. All that worry for nothing! I’ve witnessed the same thing with other couples who had spent years and decades together. Continue…
I never knew there was such thing as “Dating Status” until a few weeks ago. I didn’t know such term exists. At least I learned something new that day. Come to think of it, it all makes sense. There are men and women who date exclusively and there are some who date more than one person at one time. Continue…
I’m sitting here chatting with Diday, and I’m thinking about how lucky those of us that are in a relationship are. Our families, our children, our pets even. We all have relationships, no matter what the type or degree of relationship. We are blessed to have them. Any or all of them. Let’s take time to be grateful for what we have, no matter what our relationship aspirations are. We have much to be thankful for. I am so grateful for all the friendships I have, the love I have in my life, and even though I have many challenges I am facing right now, God is good to me, and I am unashamedly grateful for His love. Sometimes I get a bit crazy with all the turmoil in my life. I am starting a new business, Diday and I are trying to make some things happen for ourselves as a couple as well, she has a business she is running, and our families can drive us both crazy at times but all is still good. With love in our life, a song in our hearts, and God on our side, nothing can take us off of our square. Life is good, whether we acknowledge it or not! Let’s all take a moment to show gratitude for the beautiful life we have, complete with all the challenges. Life is Good!
One Love,
Khalil
Abusive relationships are easier to swallow on paper than in real life. We read about it. We heard about it. We watched about it. We even talked about it. But have we never empathize with the victim until it happens to us or to anyone that’s close to us. Only then and there does the gravity of the pain actually hurt us. I’ve asked Khalil if I could write this one for us and he agreed. He was surprised. I told him it happened to someone close to me some years ago. And so I’m here telling my side. Continue…
He said
Ok, I have to respond to what Diday said on this topic. And let’s make one thing perfectly clear. Some guys may not agree with me, and some will disagree just because their woman is looking over their shoulder. Or their mom 
but here’s the deal- We men deal physically and viscerally. So ladies, if a man asks you out on a date, trust me, he wants sex! I dare any guy to say they were not wanting sex on not just a first date, but any date! And if I’m lying, look at the smirk, smile, grin or laugh that your man (yes, your man!) is making right now.
But here’s the catch though. We want sex, it’s true, but we are also looking for love. So the fact that we are looking at you and visualizing you naked over dessert doesn’t mean we are cheap. Some women see men as only wanting sex, but the truth is we want sex as the appetizer to love. Love being the main course. We are physical by nature, and that doesn’t mean that our need for sex first cheapens a relationship. It just means we want sex first! After all, how do we know if we want to spend the rest of our lives with you if we don’t know how the sex is with you? Face it, ladies, no man is going to commit to you in his heart of hearts unless he’s been with you sexually. Sorry. That’s just the reality. Just like women won’t give up the panties unless the man commits first, trust me the man will say he’s committed but he really isn’t committed until those panties come off!!!! Before then, he’s just committed to getting those clothes off! Continue…
She Said
What constitutes a dinner date? Is it the expectation of sex afterwards? Wait, let’s not even go there yet. We skipped the kiss on the lips or cheek part. It’s still part of the mating ritual, isn’t it? I hope we haven’t gone that far yet that a simple kiss is already discarded. I’m sure it’ll stay for many centuries to come yet.
First dates are always awkward. So let’s say for the sake of art there will be no sex at this time. But what about the next? What do women really think of when a guy asks her for a date? What do men think of when asking a girl out? If you ask me I’ll say it’s ultimately SEX of course. Surely there must be some sort of attraction for the guy to ask a girl out. Attraction that is mostly felt below men’s belts. That’s a given. I’m generalizing so this does not follow for all. Continue…
He Said, She Said is a Love and Relationships Blog where we discuss, through everyday conversations and articles written by Khalil, Diday, and You, information, opinions and thoughts on building better intimate relationships. For Singles, Couples, and Will-Be Couples! Join us!!!
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