Abusive relationships are easier to swallow on paper than in real life. We read about it. We heard about it. We watched about it. We even talked about it. But have we never empathize with the victim until it happens to us or to anyone that’s close to us. Only then and there does the gravity of the pain actually hurt us. I’ve asked Khalil if I could write this one for us and he agreed. He was surprised. I told him it happened to someone close to me some years ago. And so I’m here telling my side. Continue…
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May 3rd, 2008
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Break Ups, Family Issues |
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He said
Ok, I have to respond to what Diday said on this topic. And let’s make one thing perfectly clear. Some guys may not agree with me, and some will disagree just because their woman is looking over their shoulder. Or their mom 
but here’s the deal- We men deal physically and viscerally. So ladies, if a man asks you out on a date, trust me, he wants sex! I dare any guy to say they were not wanting sex on not just a first date, but any date! And if I’m lying, look at the smirk, smile, grin or laugh that your man (yes, your man!) is making right now.
But here’s the catch though. We want sex, it’s true, but we are also looking for love. So the fact that we are looking at you and visualizing you naked over dessert doesn’t mean we are cheap. Some women see men as only wanting sex, but the truth is we want sex as the appetizer to love. Love being the main course. We are physical by nature, and that doesn’t mean that our need for sex first cheapens a relationship. It just means we want sex first! After all, how do we know if we want to spend the rest of our lives with you if we don’t know how the sex is with you? Face it, ladies, no man is going to commit to you in his heart of hearts unless he’s been with you sexually. Sorry. That’s just the reality. Just like women won’t give up the panties unless the man commits first, trust me the man will say he’s committed but he really isn’t committed until those panties come off!!!! Before then, he’s just committed to getting those clothes off! Continue…
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May 2nd, 2008
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Finding Love, Love & Sex: Keep it Hot! |
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She Said
What constitutes a dinner date? Is it the expectation of sex afterwards? Wait, let’s not even go there yet. We skipped the kiss on the lips or cheek part. It’s still part of the mating ritual, isn’t it? I hope we haven’t gone that far yet that a simple kiss is already discarded. I’m sure it’ll stay for many centuries to come yet.
First dates are always awkward. So let’s say for the sake of art there will be no sex at this time. But what about the next? What do women really think of when a guy asks her for a date? What do men think of when asking a girl out? If you ask me I’ll say it’s ultimately SEX of course. Surely there must be some sort of attraction for the guy to ask a girl out. Attraction that is mostly felt below men’s belts. That’s a given. I’m generalizing so this does not follow for all. Continue…
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April 29th, 2008
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Courtship, Love & Sex: Keep it Hot! |
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Love is blind… Or is it? Should it be? Despite the nice romantic visions that make my eyes glaze over when I hear that phrase and think about the endless bliss of blind, totally faithful love and devotion, I am, alas, snatched out of my reverie by the reality that is the life we all live; the things we experience with our five senses: sight, touch, listening, smelling and tasting. well, the last two are for another discussion 
but I’m sure you get the point.
The scary thing about love is that we sooner or later have to peel away the layers that is our fantasy and actually take the blinders off and see who we’re looking at across the breakfast table, in the bed next to us, or at that dinner party arm in arm with. And we must be honest with ourselves about who that person really is. But there’s a cool part to this too… If we are first honest with ourselves and in turn honest with our partner, those layers peel away to reveal more and more beautiful things about that partner in life. Of course, there will be those things that you find annoying, maddening, or sometimes just plain asinine about how your significant other speaks, eats, cooks, laughs, or whatever. But if we are blessed, I mean truly blessed, we will find that those things pale in comparison to the benefits. Sometimes Diday and I will find ourselves with not much to talk about, and can just go about whatever it is we’re doing without the need to speak. Continue…
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April 27th, 2008
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CoupleHood, Relationship Management |
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He Said:
Diday posted an interesting and provocative topic asking this question. I agree with much of what she says, although I have to say she is pretty lucky to have had the type of relationships where this healthy perspective can be had. My experience, however, underscores a different perspective…
The short answer to the question ‘can you be friends with your ex’ is yes you can. The underlying question to me, though, is ’should you’? My particular answer is it depends on two factors: Continue…
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April 24th, 2008
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Blogroll, Break Ups |
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She Said:
A few days ago Khalil and I were talking about nothing in particular. We do that when we’re in our relaxed mode. I found out that this is the best time to talk about something as interesting as former relationships. Besides wouldn’t it be juicy to know how your love one feels and thinks about his/her ex? I know some people don’t want know to the point of not caring for the past at all. But I think that our actions and reactions towards interpersonal relationships have some kind of a pattern that we follow depending upon the conditions that we are exposed to. Continue…
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April 22nd, 2008
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Break Ups |
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For the men out there, at some point in your life you will find yourself asked to be your best friend or family member’s Best Man at their wedding. I myself have had the (horror) honor several times in my life so far. It gets easier each time you do it, but recently a friend of mine was asked to be Best Man at his friend’s wedding. He was in a state of flux as to what he should say. I could have offered some advice, such as ‘pretend it’s jury duty and get out of it!’, but somehow I didn’t think that would help. I remember being at a literal loss for words, which, as anyone who knows me can attest, is a rarity. There are people who would pay good money to see me speechless. Now I managed to muddle through some ok speeches, but nothing really witty or outstanding that would be memorable. So to help my friend out, I decided to do what I do best: Google It!!! And I found the best collection of examples, along with some tips, at http://www.gunthergifts.com/ The cool thing about this site is that it’s a wedding site that is really nice! I was pleasantly surprised. So if anyone out there is planning a wedding or looking to buy a nice wedding gift, check these guys out. And no, they didn’t pay me a promotional fee to say this, but maybe I will shoot them an email later l0l
In any event, here are the examples. And don’t forget to pay particular attention to the tips at the end, no matter which speech or combination you use. And hey, your witty delivery of a great Best Man speech may even get you the girl of your dreams!: Continue…
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April 13th, 2008
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Blogroll, Communication |
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What can I say, long distance relationships suck. But then that’s a given. After all thats said and done about loving at a distance the truth still stands that it can work. With a lot of creativity and passion between the couple, nothing is impossible.
Now if you’re a couple looking for a future knot then your long distance situation must change. Lets be real, if you’re nothing but long distance then you should just be friends. It’s what I would call a superficial love relationship.
The thing with long distance relationships is that couples tend to lose sight of their own affair and tend to be more aware of what’s happening into each of their own circumstances. Somehow, the relationship suffers because of this. Trying to live One Life is difficult when you’re apart. It’s not impossible though.
What are the secrets to make it work? We have already written few articles and listed some general tips on how to make long distance relationship work. Some of the more favorite are Long Distance Intimacy and Dealing With Relationship Problems
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Continue…
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April 6th, 2008
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Long Distance Relationships |
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Hello Everyone!
We’d like to apologize for not posting anything for awhile. We haven’t forgotten you; quite the contrary. We think of you everyday, and how we can be better and do better for ourselves as well as for you. Having said that, Let’s get to WHY we haven’t posted in awhile. We are in the midst of making some really exciting changes here at He Said She Said. We are hard at work designing a whole new look and feel. We are excited about the changes and hope that you love them as much as we love making them for you. We won’t go into too many details at this time, because we want to totally surprise you; besides, it will be just our luck that some of the things we want to do may not be here at first and then you guys will definitely let us know how you feel! And we really don’t like disappointing anyone. So for now mum’s the word on exactly what we are doing. But we will say this: You will not be ready for what we have in store for you!!! It is going to be beyond what you may imagine. Also, we will be adding a surprise guest contributor as well, which will bring some interesting perspectives on love and relationships. So fasten your seat belts. We’re coming real soon, and it’s gonna be BIG!!! Until then, we will still try to post as often as possible while we upgrade. Until next time,
One Love
Khalil & Diday
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April 2nd, 2008
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You can have a romantic retreat everyday. There is one place in your home that is going to provide you with just that. The bedroom.
Of all the the areas you have in your home, the bedroom is your own personal space. You can decorate it according to your taste and style… that is if you’re still sleeping alone. The recipe to keep the couple from losing their personal identities in the bedroom is to merge styles and tastes in the most simple way. Not too masculine and not too feminine. Something that both can share and enjoy a lot for many years.
I have read about “bedroom etiquettes” and to tell you frankly, I don’t care for such. A couple must be comfortable with each other that they must accept each other’s weirdness in bed or out. There is just one thing to remember… KEEP IT CLEAN. A clean bedroom is always inspiring. Clutter don’t give much chance to romance or rest for that matter.
As for decorating, BALANCE and COLOR is important. This does not need a designer’s eye to see it or a college degree to master this part. Blue? Maybe not. It’s too cool. Might not help liven up your libido…if you get my drift.
Keep the TV OUT. I know this is difficult to do since this generation can’t do without it anymore. If you have to, place it in an area where it can be covered up like the cabinet but should not facing the bed. That way, the only stars of this bedroom is you and your partner. A bedroom looking too busy won’t inspire romance. If your work is not done, don’t bring it in the bedroom please. Continue…
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February 24th, 2008
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CoupleHood, Love & Sex: Keep it Hot! |
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